This weekend the weather in Philadelphia is going to be over 80 degrees. I love it when it starts to get nice outside. There is nothing like laying in the backyard tanning it up with the fellas, rubbing lotion all over one another. I can’t wait!

I still have to go Speedo shopping. I am running low on sausage huggers.

The change of the seasons brings about a change in drink selections as well.

My boy Lama likes to drink Zima in the summertime, so we have to stock up on that!

Here is the Waltdog’s list of his favoritest seasonal drinks:

Winter

Winter Beer - Guinness.

It is nice and heavy and thick. (That’s what she said). Just the way Walt likes his winter beer. It is tough to drink more then 5 of these. It is pretty filling. Plus, the next day’s after taste is pretty nasty. It tastes like I swallowed the sole of a sneaker and a few cigarette butts. There is no better feeling then waking up in your drive way in your long john’s and one sock, wondering how you wound up outside with a pillow.

Winter Drink – Johnny Walker Blue/Green/Gold

I am not a cheap date when it comes to straight liquor. I like the expensive stuff and that is why I never drink it.

Fall

Fall Beer - any Hefeweizen beer

It is somewhat cloudy wheat beer with somewhat lower alcohol per volume than other imports which means Walt’s pants usually stay on the whole night. Nothing like celebrating the changing of the leaves and the foliage with a cloudy wheat beer and a pants wearing Walt. (How gay is that?)

Fall Drink – Mad Dog 20/20

You can feel winter coming, and you know the snow shoveling is right around the corner, so you want to get drunk fast and cheap. There is no better way to forget everything in you life than drinking Mad Dog 20/20, which comes in a variety of disgusting flavors. They call it Mad Dog 20/20 because after two sips you no longer have 20/20 vision.

Spring

Spring beer -Hoegaarden or Blue Moon

Ah, my favorite time of year. Walt looks good in jeans and a t-shirt. He smells like coconuts too. My springtime beer would have to be the light cloudy wheat beers, like a Hoegaarden or a Blue Moon. I think the last time I had a whole night of drinking Hoegaardan I swallowed a whole kiwi. I don’t even know where it came from. Hoegaardan is the type of beer that you buy and sit outside with friends and you don’t hear one word they are saying. You just stare at the cooler and watch as, one by one, each person takes a Hoegaardan from the cooler and you get nervous when the beer begins to run low, then someone shows up late with a 30 pack of warm Miller Lite and reaches into the cooler and grabs a cold Hoegaardan, as if this were a fair exchange. You gently wave you hand in front of their face and say “These are not the brews you are looking for” as if you have Jedi mind trick powers. To sum it up, Hoegaardan is good.

Spring drink – Pineapple Martinis

We went to this restaurant called Roy’s and they have these big huge jugs behind the bar where chunks of pineapples are fermenting in vodka. I think this is the sweet nectar of the God’s. For all of you single ladies out there: These aren’t cheap drinks, but they are an easy way into Walt’s stuffed pants.

Summer

Summer beer – Corona

There is no better feeling than cracking open a cold ass Corona and barbequing. Stuffing the lime into the bottle and getting it to go all the way to the bottom of the bottle by jamming your thumb into the top and twisting the bottle upside, then squirting your closest friend in the face with the beer, temporarily blinding him/her with beer and lime remnants.

Summer drink – Margaritas

Enough said.

Walt got his drink and his two step, his drink and his two step, it’s on, it’s on, grab the patron and tell them that it’s on!